Mindfulness Challenges

Deeper Meaning Behind Being Mindful of Distractors

What is the underlying meaning of the assignment this week to be more attentive to all words and expressions of distraction? Words of distraction actually deflate the effectiveness of the intent that we wish to convey. How many times have you listened to a person talk who used so many qualifiers that you held the thought,

“Can’t you just get the point? I really can’t wait another 5 minutes for you to be able to use the words that I need to hear to understand what it is that you are actually saying.”

When we use many qualifying utterances in the sentences that we speak to others, our thoughts are not taken seriously. People in the public arena practice talking so that they don’t use qualifiers and distractors. They well know that their audience will stop listening after a couple of sentences if their sentences are filled with words like “uh,” and “well” and “what I mean is…”

There’s another much more important reason to become mindful of qualifiers that you inject when you talk. You are using these same qualifiers when you think about the possibility of recovery. I, as you know, interview hundreds of people every year about their thoughts with regard to recovery.

I often ask the question,

“So how is fairing, how is it looking for you?”

The answers that I hear are clues about the real intent the person has set for recovery. For example, I’m going to now paraphrase some of what I have heard over the last six years:

“Well, you know, the doctor says that it’s really not going to be possible, so of course, you know, I’m going to him for a long time and I know, um, that well, he’s you know, pretty prestigious guy, he’s, you know, well, he’s at a really, I mean, uh, a really good university and I, well you know, I–I really got the best man, and–and, that I could possibly get. And so, I don’t know, I just hope that uh, well, I don’t know, I just hope that down the rod that uh, I guess if I could just not get–get worse, I mean, you know. You know that would be really–that’s I’m like, well, like, I mean that’s what really, that’s what I guess in the end I’d like–I’d like to see.”

Maybe you think this is an exaggeration, but I assure you it is not. When people respond, there are qualifications that are embedded in how they express themselves. There are a string of distracting terms that take away from their true intention to recover. Contrast that response with the following, the question:

“How do you see the prospects for your recovery now?”

Here’s the answer:

“I’m recovering everyday – there’s no doubt about it.”

End of story. That’s it. That is all there is to the answer. That is the gist of the intention. No qualifying terms and needed or necessary. Contrast this response with:

“Well, yeah, you know, um, well, the way it turns out is I think all things considered, probably, you know, well, what people – what a lot of people really say is that they, they think I’m probably better, that I’m recovering and, you know, I don’t know, I don’t know exactly, well, I’d say, yeah, I’d probably, yeah, I’m recov–I do have, well, like everyone I have, you know, I have, I have bad–some bad days here and there, but I guess I’m–I’m probably, yeah, I’m probably recovering. I–I guess, yep, I suppose that’s right.”

Now, I don’t know how you felt about the contrast of those two responses but in just speaking them, it is profound for me. In the second response I am full of reservation and hesitation. I quite frankly do not have the true intent to take the action that is needed and required to be able to begin to reverse my symptoms.

In the very first statement there is absolutely no doubt but that in my heart, mind and soul and in every cell of my body I have set the intention to take whatever action is needed to reverse my symptoms and become symptom-free.

I am ready to live my life.
I am ready to actualize my passion.
I am ready to activate my life force.

There is a huge difference between the two statements. The first statement facilitates movement into that space of full power – that place where the intention for recovery is fully and completely activated.

It helps enormously to begin noticing all of the qualifiers that you use when you talk to anyone about anything. And, of course, as you begin to notice those qualifiers – as you talk out loud to others – those unconscious expressions of doubt and hesitation are the very same qualifiers that you are using when you talk to yourself about reversing your symptoms. .

Let me know conclude with another contrast, a contrast with a statement that is full distractions and a final salutation that is not:

“So, uh, okay everybody out there. So, you know, well, this is Robert and well, I just it’s been kind of–it’s, you know, everyone says it’s been fun for me to do these and I know kind of like a–like everybody out there, you know, like, you know, you’re listening and I, uh, so uh, you know I know that you probably uh, probably like this one, I don’t know. And I really, I don’t know whether you like, eh, shoot, I really I don’t know whether you really liked it or not, but–but I did, you know, you know I thought it was, I–this was fun. Yeah, but there’s no–yep, yeah, uh-huh, this was yep, no doubt about it. This was, this was just a whole lot of fun and anyway, so, uh this, uh, this is uh, Parkinsons Recovery and uh, I’m Robert and so, you know, like uh, have a really good week.

Now, let me see if I can contrast a very different salutation; a way that we can end our connection with one another today:

“I have fully and completely relished thinking about what I might assign to you as a challenge this week. I have been thrilled at the challenge I gave myself. I have found it fun and challenging. I know that you will also enjoy the experience. Have fun. Be challenged. Don’t get too frustrated. Whatever you do, have a wonderful time. I am Robert Rodgers and this is Parkinsons Recovery.

There is a big difference between the two for me as I speak. How about you?

Robert

Distractors

My challenge for you this week promises to be totally and completely fun and, at the same time, totally and completely frustrating. My invitation is for you to begin hearing and acknowledging all of the qualifiers that you use when you talk. Hear qualifiers when you speak like “uh,” “so” for example.

The most common utterance used in the English language is “uh.” When you say “uh” or when you say, “so…” or when you say “what I mean is…” you are creating distractions from what it is that you truly intend for the listener to hear. You are distracting yourself from your true intent and you are distracting your listeners.

When I began the Parkinsons Recovery radio program, it took some months to become familiar with how my voice sounded to me when I edited the recordings. What I heard was not what I was accustomed to hearing when I talk. The true surprise as it turns out was the many, many qualifiers that I use when I talk. Quite frankly, I was shocked.

I began counting the number of “uhh…uhh…uhs” that I used when I talked and I was flabbergasted. What I’d like to invite you to do is to begin noticing as you talk how many qualifiers you use when you speak.

A second invitation which has the promise to be quite fun is to engage a family member or friend in this particular challenge. Ask them for a day, an evening or an afternoon to catch each and every qualifier that you use. Of course you could ask them to be very specific and to alert you as to when you use a very specific qualifier like “uh,” or you could simply ask them to raise a finger every time you use any particular phrase that they believe is a qualifier.

Instead of alerting you each time you could ask a family member or friend to make a secret count. For example, as you begin dinnertime they could see how many qualifiers you have used they can tally up by the end of the meal.

Please don’t be overwhelmed by this assignment, because if this is all you are mindful about, it could potentially drive you nuts. Again, I was personally shocked by what I discovered when I began listening to myself on the radio show.

Another possibility you may want to consider is to record yourself when you actually talk, even in casual conversations and then listen to the recording afterward. It is likely you will discover just as I did that you do use many qualifiers when you talk. This week, then, become mindful of all of those distracting words — those unnecessary words — that add nothing to your true intent. Notice those distractions when you converse with another person. Include in this challenge certain profanity words that really do not add to the point that you are intending to make (unless of course they help to emphasize your meaning!).

Have fun and please do not be completely frustrated with this. I hope you find it to be an exhilarating assignment which invites to become much more mindful of each and every word that you speak. Your thoughts are precious to others and to yourself. Treat them as such.

Robert

Deeper Meaning Behind Being Attentive to Your Balance

I have an addendum to the challenge for this week. The addendum is notice how couples stand when they talk with one another a flirting way for perhaps the first time or a first date. I have noticed with great curiosity and interest how the man and how the woman stand when they talk with one another. It is generally a stressful context when a man is trying to impress the woman. Of course, the same observations may be seen when two men or two women who like each other are talking.

The question to ask is: How is each individual standing? Often I have noticed one of the people, if not both, are actually not standing on both feet; one of the feet is pitched upward rather than firmly planted on the ground. There is often great anxiety in such situations. The level of stress is off the charts. The stress and anxiety is evident from the observation that the individuals are not balanced and grounded and connected to Mother Earth.

Just notice as you look around, traveling from one place to another for the rest of the week, how people stand when they talk with one another. It is actually rare when you see two people who are firmly and evenly planted on the Earth with energy that is evenly distributed between the right side and the left side.

By way of explaining the deeper meaning behind the challenge this week I have a little exercise that I invite you to experience right now. This experience is going to be pure fantasy. It is not real, but one that I actually personally experienced when I attended my four-year healing school. It is an experience that gave me profound insights about my own body.

What I want to tell you at the outset is I’m going to create a situation where in your imagination you are going to be frightened. Now know that this is not a real situation. There is absolutely no reason to be frightened. The entire idea is to fabricate a situation where you can experience what your body habitually does when you encounter something that is fearful. Once you image the situation. I am going to ask you to freeze your body in that position so that you can sense which muscles you are tensing up and which side of your body is taking the brunt of the tension and the stress; and remember, I’m going to create a situation where you are supposed to get frightened. Then you are going to react with your body and emotions. Then you are going to freeze all of that for a few seconds.

Again (I hate to repeat myself but I was a professor for 20 years) this is not a real situation; it’s just an exercise for you to experience what your body will feel like whenever you’re under stress and whenever you are in fear (which for many people is several times a day). Here it goes.

Imagine that you are having a wonderful day today. See yourself walking down a hiking path with gorgeous trees, with an individual by your side who you love dearly and who is your closest friend. You are talking with one another. You are having a grand time. You are taking sweet sips of water as you float down the trail. You stop for a few minutes to have a snack. It is a good day to be alive and it is a gorgeous hike.

Suddenly, without notice, just 20 yards away, your walking partner notices a mama bear with two cub bears. Your partner says to you,

“Oh my God, it is a mama bear with her cubs. Look!”

You look over, spot the bears and suddenly become frightened. Now, let your body be frightened right now. Just imagine you are actually looking at the mama bear face to face. How are you reacting right now?

Where do your hands go? What about your body, your shoulders, your feet? Be shocked and allow your body to react.

Now hold it. Freeze it. Freeze the shock right now. There is no need to hold the position for long – just a few seconds will do. Sense where the tension is in your body; where is it?

Notice. Be mindful. How is your body feeling now? Now go ahead and relax.

This obviously didn’t actually happen. Relax and now reflect on which muscles were tensing up when you became scared in that imaginary circumstance.

Was it your right side?
Was it your left side?
Was it your neck?
Was it your shoulders?
Was it your knee?
Was it your calf muscles?
Was it your stomach?
Was it all of the above?

What muscles did you tense up? Your body has reacted in the same fashion over and over and over again – every day, actually, although not to the extent that it will tense up when something truly fearful and scary happens like confronting a bear face to face.

The body becomes accustomed to using and stressing certain muscles over others. This stress creates a profound imbalance in the physical muscle structure interface. It becomes difficult to walk effortlessly. Balance becomes a problem because there is not an even distribution of how muscles are working in the left hand and right, in the left and right shoulders, the right and left legs, the right and left foot, etc.

When we are mindful of the extent to which we are stressing certain muscles of our body – wherever they might be located – much more frequently and much often than other muscles, we can redistribute that. Of course we need to be scared sometimes; of course we need to tense up. We can’t change that. But that very habit of reaction is going to create stresses and strains on the physical body that creates profound imbalances. This is the simple explanation for why so many people have back problems.

I am certain you are wondering why in the world I have created two back to back mindfulness challenges that are focused on the feet. Reflexology is an emerging discipline which in essence allows for healing to occur by touching certain places on the feet. There is a connection to each and every organ, each and every blood vessel that is actually located somewhere on the toes or under the soles of the feet, or even on top of the feet. When confronting neurological challenges, many people tend to think over and over that the problem resides in the brain.

It is actually a full system issue. The key access point for healing is not in the brain. It is not through our thoughts. The door way actually opens up through our feet.

Randy Eady, better known as the Foot Whisperer, works with people who currently experience the symptoms of Parkinson’s disease. Randy has shown why being more attentive to your feet does have profound implications for being able to reverse whatever symptoms you might be currently experiencing.

A final addendum to this week’s challenge is to consider taking off your shoes on occasion – and even your socks. Begin to walk around more often that way as you allow there to be a stimulation of the parts of your feet that may need to be stimulated. By stimulating all parts of the feet you are actually energizing and activating the lazy muscles and the all of the tired organs that in essence may need to get a wake-up call.

Have fun as you notice the balance between the right and the left sides of your body. Feel free to imagine this week that same experience of getting scared; perhaps as hiking as we just envisioned and encountering a mother bear with her two cubs. Or, create your own scary experience in your imagination.

Be mindful of which muscles you activate and what part of your body you are over-stressing. Them even that out. I suspect you will discover that your mobility will be enhanced significantly and other symptoms are likely to show a wonderful resolution.

Have fun as you have delightful week noticing the balance between the right and the left sides and as you continue admiring and appreciating your feet.

Robert

Balance

Perhaps you are someone every week who tries to second guess what the mindfulness challenge will be this week? Since we focused on the feet last week, you are probably guessing it will surely be something else. Well, I have a surprise for you. The surprise is that this is part-two of focusing your attention on not only your feet but your legs.

The invitation this week is actually simple to do. Whenever you find you are standing anywhere; looking at flowers, standing while someone else talks with you or you talk with them, standing while you are waiting in line to purchase an item at the grocery store or hardware store – just standing – notice whether or not the weight is evenly distributed between your right foot and leg and your left foot and leg. Or, notice whether perhaps you are placing more weight and force on one leg than the other. For example, are you literally lifting one leg up and placing the tips of the toes on the floor or the ground and really forcing all of the weight onto either the right side or the left side? What is really happening when you stand? Notice.

It’s a simple challenge. It is also a challenge that I have discovered has revealed incredible insights about the imbalances that I have created in my own body by way of habit. I for one have not been particularly mindful of how I was actually stressing certain muscles in my body unnecessarily when standing.

To summarize, each and every opportunity that you find yourself in a situation where you are standing – standing anywhere, standing for any reason – focus your attention on how much weight you are placing on each side of your body. If you notice that more weight is being placed on either the left or the right foot and leg; redistribute the weight so that it is even across both sides of your body so that you are standing firmly on Mother Earth.

Admittedly this is a simple challenge, but I must say for me personally it has had profound consequences in being able to balance out the stresses and strains that were exhibited throughout my body. We can do this moment by moment by being mindful.

Robert